Growing a super thick playoff beard

accessoriesThe NHL Beard-a-thon tradition is still growing.  So throw on your hockey jersey and tell me, how is your playoff beard coming along?  Are you feeling like a lumberjack or still struggling at Sidney Crosby status?   Some of us just aren’t made for it.   Gretzky never tried to grow a beard and nobody faulted him for it.  But if you have the potential, here are some tips to grow and maintain your playoff beard.

Start with a clean shave.  The first day of the playoffs should be your last shave.  Shaving while your team is in the playoffs is strictly prohibited unless you want to jinx your team!

Give it time.  It’ll take a good few weeks to get some serious chin fur going.  Better hope your team makes it to the Cup finals for optimal growing time.  Don’t get discouraged by any thin or bald spots. They’re bound to happen and will become less noticeable with time.

Styling is encouraged.  Comb the beard daily.  Dye it if you want to.  You can even keep the beard soft with a little hair conditioner.  You have to do something to keep the lady in your life happy.

Trimming is optional.  If you’re looking to stimulate growth, cutting your stubble doesn’t make your hair come in thicker, contrary to what you may have heard as a teenager.  Depending on your daytime gig, you may need to sport a clean look.  Grab a beard trimmer for a quick clean up.  If you want a close sculpt, there’s no alternative to a straight edge. Some regular razors come equipped with a single blade on the back for sculpting as well.  Just promise me no goatees.  This is hockey for crying out loud.

Track your progress.  Document your beard growth with weekly photos.  Or better yet, broadcast your soup strainer on a site like and raise money for charity.

And when it’s all over?  Goodbye, beard.  That grizzly face is going to be a constant reminder of how your favorite team was so close you could taste it, only to get knocked out.  But wait…before you break out the razor, mow it down with a set of clippers.  Next, take a hot shower to wake up your pores.  Then, lather up with some shaving cream.  Ok, now you can shave.  Since it’s been weeks since your last shave, keep in mind all your usual tricks – shave carefully with the grain (the direction of the hair growth), rinse regularly, and apply additional lather as necessary.  When you’re done, don’t forget to apply a good after-shave moisturizer to keep your cheeks soft and smelling nice for the ladies.

Best of luck to your team and your beard! Tell us who you’re rooting for in the comments.


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